When you get into a place where you feel that you lack things, guess what? You attract yet more lack. Like a negativity magnet, your worries and fears increase, fewer opportunities come your way, and you get stuck.
Conversely, when steeped in gratitude for what you do have, you attract positivity. When you believe that the world is a good and bountiful place, it becomes that way. When you see yourself as deserving of love, prosperity, and abundance, you will be. It is that simple. However, sometimes, it requires making seemingly scary or emotionally painful changes to your life, I know.
How I learned to adjust my attitude
A few years back, I dated someone who was a very emotionally dark, negative person. They lived an angry, defeated existence and wanted to bring me down as well. Early on in the relationship, one of their close friends warned that I might “be robbed of my light.” person was jealous of the successes of their peers and didn’t enjoy seeing anyone else thrive and prosper—including me.
I had always been a free spirit and a mostly happy-go-lucky person, but the fear and negativity from this relationship eventually affected me. I became fearful, worried about the future, and gave up hope that I’d ever meet someone who would share a happy and fulfilling life with me.
My self-worth and confidence receded day after day, and I started to fade up, inside and out. My hair began falling out, food became less enjoyable, and I just wanted to hide and sleep when I wasn’t working (which was all the time).
I eventually ended that relationship, and it was as though a dark cloud immediately lifted. It was incredibly liberating to sever my ties to someone I’d permitted to drain my joy. I couldn’t rescue them from their darkness, but it wasn’t too late to save myself. I began reading about attracting abundance and repairing self-confidence.
At first, much of what I read seemed hokey and too new-agey, but I stuck with it. Here are some of the things I learned from my experience on the road to changing my attitude from lack to abundance.
Moving from lacking love to saying, “my heart is wide open; love pours in and out.”
If you’re feeling cut-off and emotionally lifeless, it’s time to get out into the world and give some love away. As corny as it may sound, sign up for a book club, volunteer at a senior center, or try a class at your local Y. For me, the healing came when I taught a donation fitness class to collect non-perishable items for a local food pantry.
I was so overwhelmed by the generosity and compassion of the attendees that my heart felt as though it started beating again.
I hugged everyone and collected huge bags overflowing with donations; it was one of the best nights of my life. I began to use the mantra, “my heart is wide open; love pours in and out.” Shortly after that event, I reconnected with friends from my childhood and fell madly in love with one of them.
Moving from lacking money to saying, “I have enough to share my prosperity with the world.”
Who raised some of us to believe that there could never be enough money or that the world was out to get us. Sadly, children learn early on from their parents and other adults’ relationships with money, but we can retrain our minds later in life. I was fortunate enough to be raised in a home with no feelings of lack.
My parents generously shared food, wine, and a spare bed with everyone who passed through our home. My mother would even set out trays of food if someone just casually stopped by for a brief visit.
I’m happy to say that I learned the truth early on; there truly is always enough to go around. And if we lose track of this truth, we can correct our beliefs and come back to a harmonious relationship with money.
If you’re feeling afraid or struggling with your finances, please hear me out. I promise that when you relax and work on sharing what you do have with others, more abundance and financial prosperity will find their way to you. At one point, I was working two jobs and still struggled to buy groceries and gas because I was stuck in a scary place.
When I began to share the money I did have freely, I began to make more money. Job offers and small pay increases came my way once I began donating a few dollars here and there to causes that meant something to me. A good mantra to use is “I have enough to share my prosperity with the world.”
Moving from lacking time to saying, “There’s plenty of time but I won’t take it for granted.”
We’re always rushing around from one manic moment to the next, with no relief in sight. However, this is all an illusion, and everything is already okay. Give yourself a break, and realize that you’re doing fine. Make time for yourself, value that time, and you’ll feel a weight lift off your shoulders. Take yourself out to lunch, take a leisurely walk after work now and then, and dawdle a bit.
Buy an actual newspaper this Sunday and read it from cover to cover in bed, with your phone switched off. You gain more time by making time to nurture your soul, yourself first. This approach may sound selfish, but it’s not. If you take a little bit of time for yourself every day, you’ll be able to give your time to those around you more readily.
When you feel like your needs are met, you can indeed be there for others without telling yourself, “I have no time for my needs” or “I never get to do what I want.” It’s sort of like paying yourself energetically; do it, and you’ll feel ready to give your time to others without resentment. Try saying, “There’s plenty of time but I won’t take it for granted.”