We are all familiar with children going through temper tantrums. Whether in a restaurant, store, or any other location, if a child does not get what they want, it is common for a child to make a big stink about it.
This is simply part of childhood, and it is up to the parent to work with the child and let them know that they cannot get everything they want in life. While most children eventually grow out of throwing a temper tantrum, some do not, and this is not something that stops when they hit adulthood.
Children that received everything they wanted growing up whenever they threw a temper tantrum are much more likely to continue this when they become adults. However, an adult temper tantrum is much more extreme than a child’s.
A child is expected to have a tantrum sometimes, but for an adult, not so much. Adult temper tantrums do take place, so you need to know what to look out for and how to deal with these situations.
What is an Adult Temper Tantrum
Adult temper tantrums are much like a child’s tantrum. They might not roll around on the ground or start stomping their feet all over the place, but they will raise their voice, yell and make a scene. It usually also happens when an adult does not get what they want or their way.
It also usually comes about when the adult makes someone else feel smaller than them, and they can even go into attacking the person in a verbal barrage of insults. It can also become rather loud, not to mention it might linger for far too long. While it happens all the time where someone might experience problems with service or an issue with where they go, there are always better ways to have an issue corrected over an adult temper tantrum.
Know How to Handle an Adult Temper Tantrum
Like most people, you might know someone who suffers from these outbreaks. It can be somewhat embarrassing to be around them because although they are the person who is going off, you are often grouped with them, so if you try to go back to the restaurant or other location where the person had made a scene, you might not be allowed back at all. Due to this, you need to know how to handle an adult temper tantrum and what to do when adult temper tantrums start to flair up around you.
If you are in a situation where a person is directing their tantrum at you, you need to acknowledge that they are made. Do not just acknowledge it in your head but say it out loud. Try to affirm their feelings to help defuse the situation.
You do not want it to escalate, as this might turn into a fist fight or another problem you do not want. While this usually helps, if the person starts to direct their anger and attack you directly with verbal put-downs, you need to stand firm and calm, look them in the eye, and tell them that you are not going to put up with their verbal attacks. If it continues, you must leave the location for at least a period.
You must step out for at least an hour or so if you know the person. This gives them time to cool down and think about the situation. Chances are, they will calm down and eventually apologize to you, or at least come about the situation with a cooler head.
With some people, the temper is just going to boil over. While everyone can get upset and, at times, yell at certain situations, it is often rare, especially in public. But for some people, this is more of a regular occurrence, and they need time to simmer down.
If you are in a restaurant with someone who does not like their service and is putting up a scene, it is essential to step in early, if you can. It would help if you waited a moment to interject yourself into the conversation. However, do not attack the person; instead, just try to agree with them and tell them that you can take care of it and that they should step outside, so they don’t make a scene.
Most people know when they are upset and should be away from the situation, but it is hard to stop once they get going. They will not lash out at you if you are a close friend or family member. Of course, some people just cannot be dealt with, at which case you almost need to allow it to go its course. Should this happen, though, make sure to linger after the person leaves so you can at least apologize to the server, especially if it is not their fault.
If this is a place, you frequent and want to be allowed back, talking it over with the staff after the person leaves can help. You might also want to slip them an extra tip. This can help them feel better about themselves and make you seem like the excellent guy upon leaving.
Adult tempers are no laughing matter. While most adults have learned how to handle themselves in front of others, it is not always the case. If you are around someone with an issue with their temper, you need to know how to defuse the situation. Of course, when you cannot change their course of action, you can at least clean up their mess when they leave and decide whether you want to continue going out in public with them.
