Learning how to be a bully at school can be tough. Sometimes it isn’t easy to know when and how to assert your dominance over another human being in a public setting. Thankfully, there are so many public institutions that-even if they don’t necessarily allow bullying- will look the other way on the subject.
Sure, sometimes they care about what bullying might look like to the outside world, but when you have institutions run amok with oversized classes and busy teachers, there’s a lot of room for you to hone your craft as a bully.
Just make sure at all times that you are loud and obnoxious enough to strike fear in your peers without sounding the alarms. The three types of abuse that can jettison you into the upper echelon of bullies worldwide are:
- Mental
- Physical
- Social
Once you can perfect these three key areas of your life profession, you will know that you truly run with the best of them as far as crippling the psyche, injuring the body, and crushing the will out of those lesser beings who so clearly need your help.
Mental bullying
Sometimes, the best way to start your work on a victim is to come at them with a mental approach. Mental bullying can take on several different faces, and the main goal is to ultimately create a lasting feeling of anxiety and depression in your victim.
The victim should always be afraid that you are nearby, planning to play cruel pranks on them, sending veiled threats through a steely, penetrating gaze, and of course trying to crush their will in any way possible.
If you do your job right, then the psychological toll you put on your victims should last a lifetime if they don’t seek help. There are even studies that show that your work as a bully does not go to waste. A longitudinal study in England that followed over 7,000 children throughout their lives found some truly inspiring results for bullies everywhere.
In the study, bullying was shown to affect various ages of the participants’ lives. The study takes place between the ages of 7 to 50 years old. The eye-opening study published by the American Journal of Psychiatry allows us to see the handiwork’s effect long after the bullying has ended.
The study was set up around parental interviews at ages 7 and 11, and then follow-up interviews with the participants at ages 23 and 50. The results are promising for bullies. Here’s a look at some of the juiciest data that proves that bullies truly do cause problems for their victims, which is exactly why we’re in the business of bullying in the first place, after all.
Age 23: Victims were found to have 95% higher rates of psychological distress, including:
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- Depression
- Anxiety disorders
- Suicidality.
Age 50: Hardships extended to middle age, as 50-year-old victims of bullying reported:
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- Lack of social relationships
- Economic hardships
- Poor perceived quality of life
The study didn’t specify the types of bullying that have taken place, so there’s still more legwork that needs to be done by researchers and bullies alike to pinpoint the best ways to terrorize others. The study also reported that victims had poorer cognitive function than those who didn’t report any types of bullying, spanning their entire lives through age 50. How proud and excited you must be to learn how to be a bully at school!
Specific examples of mental bullying are plentiful. Here are a few of my go-to methods whenever some new kid needs to be properly indoctrinated into the school food chain. The first thing you have to do is test their mettle.
The best way to do this is to repeatedly hurl the same insult at them and see how it takes to sink in that, yes; they are exactly what you say they are, and there’s no way they can change it. You’ve already begun to unravel their grasp on who they are as an individual, which is a big step in beginning your reign of terror.
Once you’ve begun breaking into their psyche and messing up their lives for hours on end five days a week, the seed is planted. Now you can move on to different forms of abuse that will hopefully put them in the same position as the participants and cause their entire lives to be affected for years to come.
Physical bullying
Now that you’ve gotten their attention by getting into their head, it’s time to kick it up a notch. This type of bullying is usually more prevalent when you’re a beginner and thus should be taken advantage of at an early age. Let’s refer back to the new kid at school that you’ve already broken down mentally.
You know, the new kid who can’t seem to fit in and find friends. Plus, the kid looks different than all the other kids. That alone is a perfect reason to single them out even more by bullying them.
It usually starts with something small. Being an experienced bully, I’ve seen it before firsthand. You start by poking them when they aren’t looking. Once they turn to see who poked them, lock eyes and dare them to say or do something. You might be as scared or even more scared than your victim, but don’t worry; the mental anguish you’ve already instilled gives you the upper hand.
Once they back down that first time, they’ve opened the floodgates, and you can begin a long and fruitful relationship of tripping, pinching, and smacking your victim. If you grow tired of the same old harassment, spice it up a bit. Slam a door on their fingers, push them down some stairs, or randomly walk up to and punch the stupid kid right on the nose.
You have to be careful with physical bullying. Though it’s hands-down the most effective form of bullying at younger ages due to the developing cognitive function of your victim, it’s also the easiest to spot.
Always be sneaky about it; make sure teachers and school administrators don’t see you pulling their hair or spitting on them. At this point, they know how to mean you can get and won’t usually risk speaking up about their problems at school.
Once you are comfortable with your power over the victim, take pride in yourself for ruining the development of another human being’s life! Now it’s time to let everyone know about it.
Social bullying
This type of bullying comes to fruition once you have figured out the parameters of the relationship. You know you’re victim so well that you know what will embarrass them in the eyes of your peers. This can take a few years, and if you’ve still got that burning desire to take out your problems on someone else to achieve some catharsis, continue reading.
Social media is growing as one of the best ways to humiliate your victim on a large scale. You and the victim are probably not friends on social media sites like Facebook, but you know the same people through school.
Please take a picture of the victim using a cell phone and use one of the many apps available to draw on it and make them look dumb. Then post your masterpiece online and wait for your peers to enjoy it.
Bask in the glory of drawing a stick figure performing lewd acts on your victim. At this point, your peers are too confused about their own identity (and probably a bit fearful of you anyway) to call you out for being insensitive or cruel. To fit in, they might approve of your art even if on the inside they hate it.
After you have bullied the victim to the point of tears and crushed their spirit, it might get a little old. You now have all of the tools necessary to be a bully to someone else. Maybe you should date someone and constantly bully them into staying with you or get a pet that you can torture nonstop with no fear of them speaking out about it.
The point here is that you are a bully now, and you are the person that gets respect. If you ever feel remorse for your actions, think of how well you’ve done. You’ve ruined lives and made the world know that you are strong enough to do the wrong thing consistently. You now can live a happy and healthy life that in no way has been detrimental to society as a whole.
Those stupid weaklings deserved everything you’re smart thinking could come up with. Who knows, maybe one day you’ll have kids and show them how to put people down and abuse others by abusing them; what a great cycle bullying has created for you!
Did you know, 50 people search for “How to be a Bully” every month online? It seems you are 1 of these 50. While the article above outlines how you can be a bully – just like any other article on the topic, it should also serve as a severe warning.
The steps bullying someone is illegal in every country globally; there is a law that protects people. In bullying anyone – you are going to be breaking laws. If doing it in school or work, you will be breaking the code of conduct.
Research has also shown that bullies tend to continue to bully throughout their lives. Check our expert interviews where they talk about patients they are seeing who were bullies and now have gotten themselves into trouble at work, in their relationship, and with their friends.
Imagine you have found a special someone – boy or girl and enjoy your time with them; as a bully now – it is highly likely you will bully them in years to come or possibly bully your children. Bullying forms a habit that can be hard to break – but could also get you into serious trouble. Not to mention the pain and suffering you will cause others.
You need to ask yourself today – why did you search “How to Be a Bully”? What do you hope to gain from this? If you are facing problems – there will be easier ways to deal with them than this. You will be going against an entire flow of anti-bullying that is sweeping the nation. You will be the odd one out, the outsider, so do consider your actions. Do you want to be known as a Bully?
